From the "I Can't Believe He's Still Alive/Working" File

If you're anything like us, you've watched countless hours of television. This is of course, a good thing--you're helping to stimulate the economy by downloading thousands of hours of advertising into your brain, which will then float into your subconscious and will force you to buy that fantastic contraption, ye olde "Magic Bullet" at the local Stop 'N' Shop. At least, I think that's how it works. I could be wrong, but I doubt it.


The point is, you've probably come across the crazy ramblings of this combination of The Riddler/Urkel that is pictured to the right here. That's Matthew Lesko, in case you're wondering, and he's the guy that yells at you with claims of being able to give you "free money" and such. He's a generous guy, this Lesko character. And you shouldn't let the fact that what he's selling you is utter bullshit stand in your way!


Why do I bring this up? Well, last night I was spending my time doing extremely productive things--namely, watching Sgt. Bilko for the 15th time*--when all of a sudden I see this dancing leprechaun on my screen. After a few seconds, I realize that it is Matthew Lesko, with a NEW commercial! He's slightly older, and has a more retarded haircut these days, but he's still jibber-jabbering like the idiot we all love. So congratulations, Mr. Lesko: You're not dead.

*I know what many of you are thinking--Sgt. Bilko?!? But it's one of those movies that I watch whenever it's on--and since STARZ! used to rerun it 5 times a week, I've seen it plenty of times. In the future, we could do a rundown of movies that fit this description. In fact, next time we haven't posted something for a day, remind us and we'll do just that. We're really responsive like that.